My Story

There are so many stories here and mine is about the same; the shock, the emotional and physical pain of PD. I was 40 when the first symptoms began. I was newly re-married. My children were ages 16, 10, 9 and 2. I denied the presence of a tremor, slower movement, depression, and fatigue. After two years of going it alone, I finally gave in and saw a doctor at the patient, insistence of my husband. I am a pianist and dancer. I could do neither any longer and I was dumbfounded, desolate, and drowning in unbelief at what was happening to me. I had to quit cooking because I burned and cut myself every time I tried to fix a meal. I could no longer tie my shoes or button a blouse. I was having a hard time swallowing. I was extremely depressed, could not sleep when I needed to, and had no ambition or ability to reason anything in my mind. I was dreaming, dreaming, dreaming goofy, scary things! I retreated into myself, did only the bare minimum to keep my kids going to school. None of us understood it. After a diagnosis and medication I improved somewhat although briefly. After my first neurologist told me that I would never get better and that I should get used to the idea that I would become disabled down the road about 10 years. I didn't take these words very easily.

In the last 6 years, I have studied, searched and tried many, many things to help me function. Holistic this and that, cell and brain supplements, emotional healing techniques, faith in God, anything that felt right. They have all, indeed helped. I can play the piano most of the time, go dancing once a week with my husband, teach dance once a week, keep my house up so so, stay in touch with my adult kids, my one grandaughter, but most of all, I love life, even with PD. It's precious. I still have down times; even nosedives complete with crash and burn but they do not last. Eventually I come back up, find my body and go on. PD is 'a friend who has come to teach me great truths!' It's not the preferred method of learning life's truths but I don't have a choice. I have such love and empathy for all and any who have suffered similar experiences. It's good to share; very good for me anyway. I appreciate all who have offered their feelings, opinions, and experience with PD in their life.

Tracy Anne